Resonating SO much with all of this, Lisa. Particularly the part about wanted people to relate to me as a person and writer, not just a space holder. I’ve been feeling deeply the loneliness of being a space holder, of being put on a pedestal and projected onto, and the trap of competency, of being seen as the one with the answers. There’s a deep feeling of uneasiness around the business side of my work and just being so done with dancing for the algorithm. We need models of permission to opt out. Thank you for being one.
You're so not alone in any of that. So many questions and musings I've been circling around in relation to what you shared, too, and still no answers... but even the permission to ask those questions and explore what arises is so important and supportive for me. I hope it is for you, too. And thank you for sharing some of what you're moving through here <3
What a beautiful and honest piece of writing. Thank you for inspiring us with your courage and authenticity, even when it is challenging, uncomfortable, and unexpected.
I feel so grateful for you, and I hope I will become as brave as you are.
Wishing you love and light and freedom from the postpartum depression, and anything and everything else that may be weighing you down.
Thank you as always for holding such a human space for yourself and for us. This corner of the internet feels like such a soft and affirming place to land. Witnessing and holding you as you step away from the role and identity of therapist ❤️
"We cannot avoid our needs in order to try and help someone else avoid their own disappointment." -- I had to make this a post-it note quote for my writing desk!
Grateful to be journeying along side you in a transition period where you're emerging into something new. I just quit a job before that "year mark" everyone recommends you stay committed too, but lately I'm trusting that I already know, and if I already know in my body something isn't working and can make a change (when as you said, so many cannot), why wouldn't I?
It's true-- I did come to you by way of understanding you were a professional/expert in a therapy setting, but so much of what you have woven in of yourself here and on social media, and the integrity you seek to maintain is what has kept me around. I'm excited to continue to know more of who you are beyond one identity... I also think so many of us probably came to you because it felt special to see the "I'm a human who contains multitudes" side of a "professional" who holds space for others... it's a gift that you have shared, and it is unraveling into something new and no doubt exciting. Thanks for staying true
I am so appreciative and deeply grateful for this reflection. Thank you for taking the time to share -- and I hear you on "trusting that I already know". Goodness, how easy it is to bypass that knowing sometimes. Thank you for sharing <3
Thank you so much for sharing so honestly. I am a new therapist & I am struggling with the desire to start a family & the fear of not having the capacity to see clients one on one when that time comes. I sometime feel like I’m the only one that feels this way, so thank you for helping me feel less alone.
You are absolutely not the only one. And luckily, there is so much space for flexibility, change, and transition in this work. There are always options to do what is needed for yourself and your family, to step away and then return, to change things altogether... you are certainly not alone.
Thank you for always writing what I am thinking and feeling and putting it so eloquently.
I feel your struggles with identity, authenticity, acceptance and depression. I've been struggling with the same. Your newsletters especially, more so than social media or the finished polish of books, are so human, so touching and multifaceted, vulnerable, raw and searching. It makes me feel like we are on this strange journey together each holding our lanterns high so we both may light the way for each other.
Thank you for this, Tara -- it is so felt. I'm so grateful anything I share can be a reminder that none of us have to walk any of these unknown paths alone. <3
"You, too — your value doesn’t hinge on any specific role you hold. At all. Ever."
This. Over and over.
And I can absolutely understand the difficulty and complexity of releasing roles and identities, especially when people want to keep associating you with them. And when I watch someone give themselves permission to change or release, it reminds me that I can give that to myself too, something I'm prone to forget. Something that's so damn freeing and big. Even if you never were a therapist, your words would still hit me like warm hug, they stand on their own.
Sometimes quitting is the best choice, people don't like that, but I know it's true. Thank you for saying it anyway.
This is so kind, thank you dearly. I find that permission-giving and permission-receiving piece to be so profound when I hear from others, so I'm very grateful anything I share might remind you of what is available to you, as well. Thanks for being here <3
I particularly enjoyed reading about Lisa ceasing to be a therapist as I am at that stage too. It is very hard to let go of that label about myself. But simply, I don't want to work in that way any longer. I feel called to be different now but feel some fear around it.
What a heartfelt read, as always! I've certainly felt most all of these over the last 18 months, and I feel like numbers 3, 4, and 9 are characteristic of the move away from social media at the moment (especially IG). It's liberating and refreshing to have breathing space to be 3-dimensional, and not just that "one thing" - to be essentially more ourselves. It's also a joy to watch that unfold for others, to explore what those things are (enter number 7 and 8) that they're passionate about, and support them in doing that.
"breathing space to be 3-dimensional, and not just that "one thing"" -- yes to this. Social media so easily boxes us into categories that make it hard for others, and ourselves, to remember we are whole, multilayered beings who arrive to the moment with so many parts. Thank you for sharing these reflections here, it is so appreciated and felt.
thinking of you too, lisa. friday morning I circled back to your june journaling prompts before even seeing the news and then I saw the news and just broke down. one of the reasons your writing resonates with me so much is because you remind me that it’s not wrong to feel heavy emotions. happy to hear that you made a decision that’s best for you 🤎
I'm so glad those prompts were there to circle back to -- and a good reminder for me to do so, as well. It makes so much sense to feel heavy emotions, as challenging as it is to do so. They are a sign of your aliveness, of paying attention, of being willing to stay open to the world, even when it hurts. And, it's also okay to have to turn it all off sometimes, too. Take good care <3
I'm the managing editor of a small press in Alberta, Canada, and would like to inquire about permissions to include an excerpt from this post in a book we're working on. Please contact me: kay [dot] rollans [at] brusheducation.ca.
Thank you for sharing this part of your journey and please don't feel like you are 'quitting'. Quitting has such negative conotations and I don't think what you have done is negative at all. It is brave and life affirming. Thank you again and may you blossom in your new life.
Resonating SO much with all of this, Lisa. Particularly the part about wanted people to relate to me as a person and writer, not just a space holder. I’ve been feeling deeply the loneliness of being a space holder, of being put on a pedestal and projected onto, and the trap of competency, of being seen as the one with the answers. There’s a deep feeling of uneasiness around the business side of my work and just being so done with dancing for the algorithm. We need models of permission to opt out. Thank you for being one.
You're so not alone in any of that. So many questions and musings I've been circling around in relation to what you shared, too, and still no answers... but even the permission to ask those questions and explore what arises is so important and supportive for me. I hope it is for you, too. And thank you for sharing some of what you're moving through here <3
What a beautiful and honest piece of writing. Thank you for inspiring us with your courage and authenticity, even when it is challenging, uncomfortable, and unexpected.
I feel so grateful for you, and I hope I will become as brave as you are.
Wishing you love and light and freedom from the postpartum depression, and anything and everything else that may be weighing you down.
Thank you for your words and your sharing,
May you be happy
May you be peaceful
May you be safe
May you be loved
I feel and appreciate these words so much. Thank you thank you thank you.
Thank you as always for holding such a human space for yourself and for us. This corner of the internet feels like such a soft and affirming place to land. Witnessing and holding you as you step away from the role and identity of therapist ❤️
Thank you Katie, for being here and for all you do to create human-centered spaces, too. <3
"We cannot avoid our needs in order to try and help someone else avoid their own disappointment." -- I had to make this a post-it note quote for my writing desk!
Grateful to be journeying along side you in a transition period where you're emerging into something new. I just quit a job before that "year mark" everyone recommends you stay committed too, but lately I'm trusting that I already know, and if I already know in my body something isn't working and can make a change (when as you said, so many cannot), why wouldn't I?
It's true-- I did come to you by way of understanding you were a professional/expert in a therapy setting, but so much of what you have woven in of yourself here and on social media, and the integrity you seek to maintain is what has kept me around. I'm excited to continue to know more of who you are beyond one identity... I also think so many of us probably came to you because it felt special to see the "I'm a human who contains multitudes" side of a "professional" who holds space for others... it's a gift that you have shared, and it is unraveling into something new and no doubt exciting. Thanks for staying true
I am so appreciative and deeply grateful for this reflection. Thank you for taking the time to share -- and I hear you on "trusting that I already know". Goodness, how easy it is to bypass that knowing sometimes. Thank you for sharing <3
❤️
Thank you so much for sharing so honestly. I am a new therapist & I am struggling with the desire to start a family & the fear of not having the capacity to see clients one on one when that time comes. I sometime feel like I’m the only one that feels this way, so thank you for helping me feel less alone.
You are absolutely not the only one. And luckily, there is so much space for flexibility, change, and transition in this work. There are always options to do what is needed for yourself and your family, to step away and then return, to change things altogether... you are certainly not alone.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Thank you for always writing what I am thinking and feeling and putting it so eloquently.
I feel your struggles with identity, authenticity, acceptance and depression. I've been struggling with the same. Your newsletters especially, more so than social media or the finished polish of books, are so human, so touching and multifaceted, vulnerable, raw and searching. It makes me feel like we are on this strange journey together each holding our lanterns high so we both may light the way for each other.
So thank you Lisa. ❤️
Thank you for this, Tara -- it is so felt. I'm so grateful anything I share can be a reminder that none of us have to walk any of these unknown paths alone. <3
"You, too — your value doesn’t hinge on any specific role you hold. At all. Ever."
This. Over and over.
And I can absolutely understand the difficulty and complexity of releasing roles and identities, especially when people want to keep associating you with them. And when I watch someone give themselves permission to change or release, it reminds me that I can give that to myself too, something I'm prone to forget. Something that's so damn freeing and big. Even if you never were a therapist, your words would still hit me like warm hug, they stand on their own.
Sometimes quitting is the best choice, people don't like that, but I know it's true. Thank you for saying it anyway.
Love the picture of the coast by the way :)
This is so kind, thank you dearly. I find that permission-giving and permission-receiving piece to be so profound when I hear from others, so I'm very grateful anything I share might remind you of what is available to you, as well. Thanks for being here <3
💜
<3 <3
I particularly enjoyed reading about Lisa ceasing to be a therapist as I am at that stage too. It is very hard to let go of that label about myself. But simply, I don't want to work in that way any longer. I feel called to be different now but feel some fear around it.
You are not alone! The fear can be there and not be a barrier, I've found.
Wishing you luck and peace for this transition, thanks for your words.
Thank you so much.
I love how you are always putting your humanity first. Thank you for the reminder. 
Thank you for being here <3
What a heartfelt read, as always! I've certainly felt most all of these over the last 18 months, and I feel like numbers 3, 4, and 9 are characteristic of the move away from social media at the moment (especially IG). It's liberating and refreshing to have breathing space to be 3-dimensional, and not just that "one thing" - to be essentially more ourselves. It's also a joy to watch that unfold for others, to explore what those things are (enter number 7 and 8) that they're passionate about, and support them in doing that.
"breathing space to be 3-dimensional, and not just that "one thing"" -- yes to this. Social media so easily boxes us into categories that make it hard for others, and ourselves, to remember we are whole, multilayered beings who arrive to the moment with so many parts. Thank you for sharing these reflections here, it is so appreciated and felt.
thinking of you too, lisa. friday morning I circled back to your june journaling prompts before even seeing the news and then I saw the news and just broke down. one of the reasons your writing resonates with me so much is because you remind me that it’s not wrong to feel heavy emotions. happy to hear that you made a decision that’s best for you 🤎
I'm so glad those prompts were there to circle back to -- and a good reminder for me to do so, as well. It makes so much sense to feel heavy emotions, as challenging as it is to do so. They are a sign of your aliveness, of paying attention, of being willing to stay open to the world, even when it hurts. And, it's also okay to have to turn it all off sometimes, too. Take good care <3
Hello Lisa,
I'm the managing editor of a small press in Alberta, Canada, and would like to inquire about permissions to include an excerpt from this post in a book we're working on. Please contact me: kay [dot] rollans [at] brusheducation.ca.
Best,
Kay
Thank you so much for sharing this. I really needed to be reminded of #4. I don’t owe anyone sameness. This will be a mantra for me from now on.
Thank you for sharing this part of your journey and please don't feel like you are 'quitting'. Quitting has such negative conotations and I don't think what you have done is negative at all. It is brave and life affirming. Thank you again and may you blossom in your new life.