I have been feeling the same lately - like I have read enough self-help books, attended enough workshops to learn how to be more self-aware or how to do self-care or how to practice self-compassion, focused enough energy on healing and how to be whole in this seemingly broken world. I just want to be and live and do the things that bring me joy and that are just fun, like reading a novel, watching a movie, coloring, writing for myself, hanging out with my daughter, taking a walk. Thinking about your own words about living an ordinary life (https://lisaolivera.substack.com/p/give-me-ordinary), a post I read recently about ambition (https://annehelen.substack.com/p/this-will-change-the-way-you-think) and (I love Culture Study) Anne Helen Petersen's piece on optimization (https://annehelen.substack.com/p/the-optimization-sinkhole), I wonder if things like "healing", "self-care", and "growth" are being optimized. When I consider *not* reading an article related to wellbeing or mental health, I worry that I am may miss out on some life-altering tip or perspective and so I read it instead of reading something just for fun or going on a treasure hunt (https://rebeccaholden.substack.com/p/74-treasure-seeking). I still want to grow, heal from old trauma, stop being a people-pleaser, and learn to trust myself and my own intuition, but I also want to live and be present in my life. Consuming content can be endless. My life isn't. Thank you so much for your words and sharing your perspective so openly and honestly.
I love and appreciate this comment so much -- so many great links, some I've read and others I haven't. I too absolutely love Culture Study; one of my favorites! I linked to her optimization piece last week because it resonated so deeply. That feeling of worrying you'll miss out if you skip reading certain things is so resonant, and also one I think is perpetuated by this culture we live in... it's such a gift to returning to the desire to be present in the life we have, even when it isn't optimal or ideal at all times. Thank you for your generous share. <3
“All this to say, maybe putting our attention on the things that bring us more alive instead of always keeping it on healing and growth is what allows for the forward movement we’re looking for, in ways that feel more free”. Yes! 👏🏼Feel this on so many levels ✨💛
Lisa thank you so much for writing this. The presence in everyday moments is so precious and something I’m striving for, practicing and reminding myself each time to just be with it, whatever it is.
Also, seeing you be so content in your belonging here and not straying from it is truly so beautiful to witness. With the opportunity that your Instagram following offers, I truly admire you so much to stay committed to what’s so clearly important and True to you. It’s such an expanse to witness and see modelled. Thank you.
Thank you for being here and for showing up and sharing your heart. It is so deeply appreciated 🤍
This means a lot -- truly. Thank you for sharing this reflection. And remembering it's all a practice is truly one of the most helpful and supportive things for me in all of this. <3
I’ve been consumed with healing too. Reading self-help books morphed into learning different kinds of meditation. I don’t have to always be learning or evolving.
I love your reflection on where you’re putting your attention. It’s such a good reminder that our obsession with the self (e.g., self-help, self-care, self-whatever) is just the flip side of individualism and serves the status quo. That’s not to say I don’t believe in taking care of ourselves! But you know what I mean.
Anyhow, I’ve been binging on the life and work of Simone Weil recently, and “attention” is a core focus of her philosophy. She saw attention not as a concentrated focus on the other, but as the result of an emptying of self to see others “as they are related to themselves, and not to me.” She also say attention as a matter of waiting for the other/the world to make itself known, rather than a particular action.
I definitely know what you mean -- there's such a balance in relating to the self in ways that are actually generative and supportive, rather than obsessive and individualistic. The differentiation is hard to make in a culture hellbent on us forgetting we aren't projects or objects.
And I haven't explored her work in a while, aside from some quotes I know of hers about attention... you're inspiring me to look more deeply. Thank you for sharing -- so helpful.
Lisa, It is always reassuring to read someone's growth path resembles mine. I too have stopped obsessing and moved toward the trust that I will learn what I need to learn when I am at the place of understanding. Until then I am fine right where I am. D
"May we remember being thrown out of the nest continually isn’t a sign of not doing enough, but a sign of aliveness. May we find something new each time we’re thrown out of the nest." There is always a line or two from your newsletter that feels like it was written directly to me and this is it for this week. I have been thrown out of the nest many times over the last few months. I've lost my job, my grandma, and my home. Many foundations have crumbled and I'm left feeling so many things, but I feel really empowered and capable reading these words. <3
I'm so grateful these words found you in a time where they resonate; such a reminder that we're each tethered to the same things in so many ways. May you find new solid ground amid the crumbling, amid the change -- may that sense of empowerment continue glimmering in moments you forget. xx
I think the best writing reminds us of the things that are the Most Important Things but that have been overlayed by fearful self-protection and the pressure of our particular culture. I read your piece and thought, Yes Yes Yes! Thank you 🙏🏻
I once got frustrated with my therapist because I wanted more rigor in our practice. She asked me why and I said "Because I want to be better! I want to be fixed!" and she replied "But there's nothing WRONG with you." Whew.
I wish I could say I embodied that, but I am still always looking to optimize myself. I have to constantly remind myself of her words. But I am grateful I can now recognize when I am trying to fix myself into something I perceive as better rather than embracing who I am.
“...less popularity; less wide appeal; these are natural consequences of no longer trying to be for everybody.” So powerful to hear these words, written with such clarity and grace, about the things it is so easy to be perpetually in pursuit of in our culture. Thank you for this wonderful post.
Well done Lisa, thank you for giving us such a lovely reminder. Also, your photography is truly wonderful. Please keep going!
When my Dad was dying and I reflected on his life it gave me the opportunity to discern what was most important to me. My realization was similar to what you are writing about: vibrant health, teaching & contribution, a lot of genuine smiling & eye contact, meaningful conversation and a lot of reading. That was IT. My entire list.
Personal growth burnout is real, we need to simply LIVE our life with intention and the growth and healing will follow when it's ready.
Are you inside my head?! Yes, yes, YES to all of this. Like the earlier comment from Amy said, "I just want to be and live and do the things that bring me joy and are just fun."
I am sick of consuming and creating, it feels like it's been relentless the past couple of years and I'm done trying.
You absolutely should. I used to shoot film constantly in my younger years and set it to the side for a while... it has felt like a homecoming to prioritize and practice it again. It's been strangely healing in a way. The slow pace, the imperfection, the thoughtfulness required, the non-instant gratification, the personal nature of it... it all feels really meaningful to be practicing again. Can't recommend it enough.
I have been feeling the same lately - like I have read enough self-help books, attended enough workshops to learn how to be more self-aware or how to do self-care or how to practice self-compassion, focused enough energy on healing and how to be whole in this seemingly broken world. I just want to be and live and do the things that bring me joy and that are just fun, like reading a novel, watching a movie, coloring, writing for myself, hanging out with my daughter, taking a walk. Thinking about your own words about living an ordinary life (https://lisaolivera.substack.com/p/give-me-ordinary), a post I read recently about ambition (https://annehelen.substack.com/p/this-will-change-the-way-you-think) and (I love Culture Study) Anne Helen Petersen's piece on optimization (https://annehelen.substack.com/p/the-optimization-sinkhole), I wonder if things like "healing", "self-care", and "growth" are being optimized. When I consider *not* reading an article related to wellbeing or mental health, I worry that I am may miss out on some life-altering tip or perspective and so I read it instead of reading something just for fun or going on a treasure hunt (https://rebeccaholden.substack.com/p/74-treasure-seeking). I still want to grow, heal from old trauma, stop being a people-pleaser, and learn to trust myself and my own intuition, but I also want to live and be present in my life. Consuming content can be endless. My life isn't. Thank you so much for your words and sharing your perspective so openly and honestly.
I love and appreciate this comment so much -- so many great links, some I've read and others I haven't. I too absolutely love Culture Study; one of my favorites! I linked to her optimization piece last week because it resonated so deeply. That feeling of worrying you'll miss out if you skip reading certain things is so resonant, and also one I think is perpetuated by this culture we live in... it's such a gift to returning to the desire to be present in the life we have, even when it isn't optimal or ideal at all times. Thank you for your generous share. <3
“All this to say, maybe putting our attention on the things that bring us more alive instead of always keeping it on healing and growth is what allows for the forward movement we’re looking for, in ways that feel more free”. Yes! 👏🏼Feel this on so many levels ✨💛
<3 <3 feels so so true.
Meeeeee too.
<3
Lisa thank you so much for writing this. The presence in everyday moments is so precious and something I’m striving for, practicing and reminding myself each time to just be with it, whatever it is.
Also, seeing you be so content in your belonging here and not straying from it is truly so beautiful to witness. With the opportunity that your Instagram following offers, I truly admire you so much to stay committed to what’s so clearly important and True to you. It’s such an expanse to witness and see modelled. Thank you.
Thank you for being here and for showing up and sharing your heart. It is so deeply appreciated 🤍
This means a lot -- truly. Thank you for sharing this reflection. And remembering it's all a practice is truly one of the most helpful and supportive things for me in all of this. <3
I’ve been consumed with healing too. Reading self-help books morphed into learning different kinds of meditation. I don’t have to always be learning or evolving.
"I don't have to always be learning or evolving." Bingo.
Also fun fact: we are always evolving, even or especially when we don’t notice?
It's true!
I love your reflection on where you’re putting your attention. It’s such a good reminder that our obsession with the self (e.g., self-help, self-care, self-whatever) is just the flip side of individualism and serves the status quo. That’s not to say I don’t believe in taking care of ourselves! But you know what I mean.
Anyhow, I’ve been binging on the life and work of Simone Weil recently, and “attention” is a core focus of her philosophy. She saw attention not as a concentrated focus on the other, but as the result of an emptying of self to see others “as they are related to themselves, and not to me.” She also say attention as a matter of waiting for the other/the world to make itself known, rather than a particular action.
I definitely know what you mean -- there's such a balance in relating to the self in ways that are actually generative and supportive, rather than obsessive and individualistic. The differentiation is hard to make in a culture hellbent on us forgetting we aren't projects or objects.
And I haven't explored her work in a while, aside from some quotes I know of hers about attention... you're inspiring me to look more deeply. Thank you for sharing -- so helpful.
Lisa, It is always reassuring to read someone's growth path resembles mine. I too have stopped obsessing and moved toward the trust that I will learn what I need to learn when I am at the place of understanding. Until then I am fine right where I am. D
Yes to this!
"May we remember being thrown out of the nest continually isn’t a sign of not doing enough, but a sign of aliveness. May we find something new each time we’re thrown out of the nest." There is always a line or two from your newsletter that feels like it was written directly to me and this is it for this week. I have been thrown out of the nest many times over the last few months. I've lost my job, my grandma, and my home. Many foundations have crumbled and I'm left feeling so many things, but I feel really empowered and capable reading these words. <3
I'm so grateful these words found you in a time where they resonate; such a reminder that we're each tethered to the same things in so many ways. May you find new solid ground amid the crumbling, amid the change -- may that sense of empowerment continue glimmering in moments you forget. xx
I think the best writing reminds us of the things that are the Most Important Things but that have been overlayed by fearful self-protection and the pressure of our particular culture. I read your piece and thought, Yes Yes Yes! Thank you 🙏🏻
Thank you for this, and for your ongoing presence here <3
so much good here, & that red car, most of all, rushing forward & vividly greeting me!
I keep thinking of it -- it felt like a live being in a way!
I once got frustrated with my therapist because I wanted more rigor in our practice. She asked me why and I said "Because I want to be better! I want to be fixed!" and she replied "But there's nothing WRONG with you." Whew.
I wish I could say I embodied that, but I am still always looking to optimize myself. I have to constantly remind myself of her words. But I am grateful I can now recognize when I am trying to fix myself into something I perceive as better rather than embracing who I am.
Our mindsets are strong and can change our world. I love that therapy helps us do that.
Thanks as always for your wise reflections.
“...less popularity; less wide appeal; these are natural consequences of no longer trying to be for everybody.” So powerful to hear these words, written with such clarity and grace, about the things it is so easy to be perpetually in pursuit of in our culture. Thank you for this wonderful post.
Well done Lisa, thank you for giving us such a lovely reminder. Also, your photography is truly wonderful. Please keep going!
When my Dad was dying and I reflected on his life it gave me the opportunity to discern what was most important to me. My realization was similar to what you are writing about: vibrant health, teaching & contribution, a lot of genuine smiling & eye contact, meaningful conversation and a lot of reading. That was IT. My entire list.
Personal growth burnout is real, we need to simply LIVE our life with intention and the growth and healing will follow when it's ready.
Are you inside my head?! Yes, yes, YES to all of this. Like the earlier comment from Amy said, "I just want to be and live and do the things that bring me joy and are just fun."
I am sick of consuming and creating, it feels like it's been relentless the past couple of years and I'm done trying.
I love your photography.
That means so much -- thank you!
Seriously! You are inspiring me to pull out the old camera & film! It is something I have been thinking about for a while now.
You absolutely should. I used to shoot film constantly in my younger years and set it to the side for a while... it has felt like a homecoming to prioritize and practice it again. It's been strangely healing in a way. The slow pace, the imperfection, the thoughtfulness required, the non-instant gratification, the personal nature of it... it all feels really meaningful to be practicing again. Can't recommend it enough.
Yes it’s great!
So much to feel and so much to honour - thank you so very much for sharing what I’ve not been able to articulate these past few seasons 🧡💛
Thank you for reading <3