Holy shit Lisa, I didn’t know this about you. This explains why I resonate with your writing. I discovered through DNA that I was an NPE in 2019, a secret my parents had taken to their graves. I’m working on a memoir describing unexplained odd feelings of disconnection I had throughout childhood and dive into exploring my mother’s history as an adoptee who was raised by her grandmother. It’s tentatively titled My Mother’s Ghosts. I don’t know when I’ll finish it or if it will ever get published, but it’s a great exploration of family history through genetic genealogy and historical research. Thanks sharing your writing, your life.
Wow -- I hope you keep writing. I don't know if you've read any of Dani Shapiro's work, but her memoir Inheritance would probably resonate with you deeply. She also has an incredible podcast, Family Secrets, where she has explored this and more. Thank you for sharing this here.
Thank you for sharing your story. I would have been shocked by such a discovery, I can't imagine how you felt when you found out. I love the title you came up with.
Thank you. The hard part was taking the fire hose of information pouring through me & weaving a relatable & authentic story arc from it all. I believe I’ve done most of it, but still needs work. Keep your eyes peeled for it someday.
Lisa, the part about our wounds being so woven into us that we cannot fully separate from them without separating from ourselves...a revelation. I am going to sit with that one! It reminded me of a beautiful song called “Keep It Open” by Alexandra Blakely: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CkpLLvUjmX1/?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
I absolutely agree with you, what Lisa writes about resonates in my soul. Her openness to her readers is a great asset to me, and I thank her for these wonderful letters.
"But it does allow me to soften into the unknown instead of only assume the worst. It allows me to leave room for the unimaginable"
I've been trying to do this more lately. I'm learning to let go of control more and opening myself to what the universe has in store -- the good, the bad, and the ugly (and, if it's the movie, that's definitely good for me lol)
Also, I loved The Atlantic article you shared about "awkward" silences. Having taught for over a decade now, I've learned to embrace the silence. With my classes on Zoom, I encourage students to DM me if they're uncomfortable sharing their thoughts openly with the class. I then share them anonymously. I've found that helps
Thanks for the reminder something's we always deal with and heal from and work through again and again. I write about this and firmly believe it, but also it helps for someone else to remind me of that too.
“Some wounds become so woven into who we are that separating from them entirely would be to separate from ourselves; the only option is to learn how to embrace those wounds with care, with understanding, with kindness.”
“May our wounds be tended by the things we couldn’t have ever dreamed of.”
The feel of that bit seems to hold the whole thought for me.
Beautiful story, Lisa. Such visceral healing there. 😊
I have this similar longing like you described before the meeting… and I often wonder if there is something I can do to address it… but I think it’s just one of those human/aging things holding a timeless loss for me to integrate, without doing anything except accepting it as part of the universal experience. Leaves an underlying sadness with at least some hope of sharing it in the path… again, like you said, to repeat… “May our wounds be tended by the things we couldn’t have ever dreamed of.”
Thank you for this -- the piece about accepting it as part of the whole feels important. Those longings can sometimes become sneaky in the way of making us assume we're supposed to get rid of them... Releasing that as the goal has been so helpful. Thank you for reading ✨
Exactly! Yes :-) that good old “fix it” goal is so very hard for me to change! Altering the initial step to: stop-and-listen (before the dark energy builds) has been a saving grace for me.
"When I sit in my living room feeling like nothing I do matters and asking myself what the point of any of this is" ... Yes! Thank you for capturing the mundanity of this eternally recurring feeling! And for the reminder that there is always an up side, too.
I really appreciate your newsletter. Each week is its own work of art, with details and resonance to discover in each corner. It's clear a lot goes into it each week, so thank you for creating these and sharing them with us! I read this as part of my Monday AM routine, and Human Stuff makes me look forward to Monday mornings, which is quite a feat!
“May the best days of our lives serve as reminders to stay open to life.” - If you’ve never taken the time to read the number one bestseller of all time, I invite you to stay open to life and give God a try! There is a purpose to all this human stuff. I hope you find it!
“May we not let the cruelty of the world take away our ability to dream.”
This resonated as I’ve realized over the past while that I’ve stopped dreaming. Instead I “plan” or choose one of the logical options in front of me. And I have always been a dreamer so realizing that I’d stopped was very saddening.
Thank you for sharing, so much more resonated with me and brought me to tears while reading
Holy shit Lisa, I didn’t know this about you. This explains why I resonate with your writing. I discovered through DNA that I was an NPE in 2019, a secret my parents had taken to their graves. I’m working on a memoir describing unexplained odd feelings of disconnection I had throughout childhood and dive into exploring my mother’s history as an adoptee who was raised by her grandmother. It’s tentatively titled My Mother’s Ghosts. I don’t know when I’ll finish it or if it will ever get published, but it’s a great exploration of family history through genetic genealogy and historical research. Thanks sharing your writing, your life.
Wow -- I hope you keep writing. I don't know if you've read any of Dani Shapiro's work, but her memoir Inheritance would probably resonate with you deeply. She also has an incredible podcast, Family Secrets, where she has explored this and more. Thank you for sharing this here.
Yep. Her story is not my story, but it’s written well. I’ll keep working on mine. Thanks!
Thank you for sharing your story. I would have been shocked by such a discovery, I can't imagine how you felt when you found out. I love the title you came up with.
Thank you. The hard part was taking the fire hose of information pouring through me & weaving a relatable & authentic story arc from it all. I believe I’ve done most of it, but still needs work. Keep your eyes peeled for it someday.
Lisa, the part about our wounds being so woven into us that we cannot fully separate from them without separating from ourselves...a revelation. I am going to sit with that one! It reminded me of a beautiful song called “Keep It Open” by Alexandra Blakely: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CkpLLvUjmX1/?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
Oh thank you for sharing -- I will listen! 🤍
“I was used to feeling like no one else could possibly understand.”
My lifelong version is: I AM used to feeling like no one else could possibly understand.
Thank you for your honest transparency and vulnerability. This hits me deep in my soul.
I'm glad it reached you -- thanks for reading. xx
I absolutely agree with you, what Lisa writes about resonates in my soul. Her openness to her readers is a great asset to me, and I thank her for these wonderful letters.
"But it does allow me to soften into the unknown instead of only assume the worst. It allows me to leave room for the unimaginable"
I've been trying to do this more lately. I'm learning to let go of control more and opening myself to what the universe has in store -- the good, the bad, and the ugly (and, if it's the movie, that's definitely good for me lol)
Also, I loved The Atlantic article you shared about "awkward" silences. Having taught for over a decade now, I've learned to embrace the silence. With my classes on Zoom, I encourage students to DM me if they're uncomfortable sharing their thoughts openly with the class. I then share them anonymously. I've found that helps
Thank you for sharing this! That's such a kind way to hold that space.
Thanks for the reminder something's we always deal with and heal from and work through again and again. I write about this and firmly believe it, but also it helps for someone else to remind me of that too.
Absolutely 🤍
a taurus! <3
also loved this..
“Some wounds become so woven into who we are that separating from them entirely would be to separate from ourselves; the only option is to learn how to embrace those wounds with care, with understanding, with kindness.”
Big Taurus energy... My sister is a Taurus, too! 🤍✨
“May our wounds be tended by the things we couldn’t have ever dreamed of.”
The feel of that bit seems to hold the whole thought for me.
Beautiful story, Lisa. Such visceral healing there. 😊
I have this similar longing like you described before the meeting… and I often wonder if there is something I can do to address it… but I think it’s just one of those human/aging things holding a timeless loss for me to integrate, without doing anything except accepting it as part of the universal experience. Leaves an underlying sadness with at least some hope of sharing it in the path… again, like you said, to repeat… “May our wounds be tended by the things we couldn’t have ever dreamed of.”
Thank you for the story and reflections!
Thank you for this -- the piece about accepting it as part of the whole feels important. Those longings can sometimes become sneaky in the way of making us assume we're supposed to get rid of them... Releasing that as the goal has been so helpful. Thank you for reading ✨
Exactly! Yes :-) that good old “fix it” goal is so very hard for me to change! Altering the initial step to: stop-and-listen (before the dark energy builds) has been a saving grace for me.
listening to private life and feeling so sweetly melancholic....
It is so much that!
The daily routine photo makes me giggle.
Real simple, real human.
Me, too.💗
"When I sit in my living room feeling like nothing I do matters and asking myself what the point of any of this is" ... Yes! Thank you for capturing the mundanity of this eternally recurring feeling! And for the reminder that there is always an up side, too.
Yes, that's exactly the feeling I'm so familiar with. At times like this, I think I'm on the verge of some kind of epiphany.
I really appreciate your newsletter. Each week is its own work of art, with details and resonance to discover in each corner. It's clear a lot goes into it each week, so thank you for creating these and sharing them with us! I read this as part of my Monday AM routine, and Human Stuff makes me look forward to Monday mornings, which is quite a feat!
“May the best days of our lives serve as reminders to stay open to life.” - If you’ve never taken the time to read the number one bestseller of all time, I invite you to stay open to life and give God a try! There is a purpose to all this human stuff. I hope you find it!
“May we not let the cruelty of the world take away our ability to dream.”
This resonated as I’ve realized over the past while that I’ve stopped dreaming. Instead I “plan” or choose one of the logical options in front of me. And I have always been a dreamer so realizing that I’d stopped was very saddening.
Thank you for sharing, so much more resonated with me and brought me to tears while reading
My thoughts are similar to yours, Maggie. Beautiful quote, it gave me a reason to reconsider my view of gratitude.