What I want to say here
Your words always have such a soothing energy for me. Thank YOU for being here. x
So much to say and yet nothing to say at all. Feeling this, too. Sometimes I think that holding the duality of it all is where we’re our most human. 💙 Or maybe it’s that the things we see as one extreme are really just enveloped into the other - maybe quiet and loud or grief and joy aren’t opposites, but instead all painted with the same brush, and it’s only our minds that creates the dichotomies. Either way, here for the paradox of it all!
Clearly, you care, Lisa. It's also clear that you're "getting it."
I know Life to be ebb and flow, smooth and stumbly, sweet and sad, fulfilling and depleting, uplifting and depressing, hateful and benevolent. It's been 50 years since my husband and I first kissed, and we've been married for 48. We've welcomed four children, one passed when she was only 5 and we enjoy (most of the time!) childhood with five grandchildren born to our three who came after the daughter who continues to live in our hearts.
Nothing is ever static, nor is it ever continuously pleasant. The unpleasant is just that - unpleasant - and I hate every minute of it! Nevertheless, I'd be a mess without change, upheaval, and dynamic equilibrium (even though it's exhausting).
Your words - what you want to say - always help me remember what I've just said. Reading your words and writing mine bolsters my knowledge (acquired over many years of living through it all) that humans are fluid creatures who must constantly fluctuate to live.
I love your way of processing emotions thoughts and feelings through your writing here! I am trying to hold more space for the tension and paradoxes in my own life and often it feels there isn’t the language or maybe more time is needed to process but as you so beautifully wrote there is so much that needs to be integrated and the sorrow that comes with knowing that but at least recognizing it. Collectively and personally there was so much upheaval in my own life during 2020 that I feel I still carry the weight of as I try to move through all that life requires know and maybe acknowledging that will help in some way 🏼
Feeling so much of this, especially all that I don’t have the space or capacity to integrate in this season. I am grateful for your reminder that just acknowledging that can be enough right now. happy anniversary. x
This is so damn good, you totally rock Lisa Olivera!
What I want to say here is that I appreciate you mentioning the process of showing up to write, the ritual of it without attaching to the outcome. That holds meaning for me today.
Also, happy anniversary💕
So much truth in all this. I retired during the pandemic, I was heading that way as it was, but...it still feels like so much disappeared. People I’ve. Made friends with through my writing, much younger than me, are struggling to reconnect with the world, with friends, with life. In hindsight, retirement is much the same, except we all seem to look forward to walking away from ‘everything’, without realizing how much of ‘everything’ was good, and part of feeling alive. I’m making the most of it, writing, making music, all without the stress of having to make a living at it, which is good, and the doing, even with all its ups and downs, fills me up. I’m actually afraid to stop now, but fortunately, I still enjoy it all.
Your words arrive and just like that, percolate in and reach crevices inside that haven't yet exactly translated into words. Thank you! ♡🌸
I always love how your shares are just so utterly relatable. An acknowledgement of this kaleidoscope of being human. Thank you. 🤎
Yes to your portals, your edges, & layers. Grateful to be on this spinning rock with you.
Needed to hear this today 💚 “sometimes our inner seasons don’t quite match what outer seasons insist on, and maybe that’s just fine.” Thank you x
What I want to say here is that I love reading your posts.
Your photograph "a portal" is like drinking in a feeling with my eyes. So autumnal and liminal. Love.
As someone else said, your words are so soothing. Like a balm of truth and presence. I especially resonated with the collective performance of amnesia/ delusion between 2020 and now. And the the both/and sensations around integration, capacity for it and the sense that time is the most active form of integration sometimes.
Thank you 🍂
As you write, you connect with many people at once. You allow us space to befriend you in a way that is very new to our culture, our humanness. Maybe a somewhat dilute friendship, but valid. I imagine many of us reading here feel as I do.
As I read today, I felt an overall comfort and compassion for your experience - such an ancient process moving from one perspective to another while on life’s path - like professional to partner, lover, parent (and omg Mother), and then what comes next.
When you say: “Clinging to sweetness” - I’m reminded of many colors of that in my life. Now, with my grown daughter at home, I sometimes feel in some odd time loop seeing her in a spot she once was as a child, and experiencing both at once. Reminding myself she is an adult helps me because the old “cling…” thoughts went side by side with protective parent thoughts, and I’m letting go of that to respect her independence. Such a good practice for me now, because I’m actively letting go of things I don’t need to do anything about (so so many…).
I think I get the “One up myself” concept. That I must improve to be of value. Student, young adult, friendships, aging issues, all phases triggering the competitive thoughts. Loving the Ocean quote. Connects here.
Best wishes to you, Lisa, and to all your loving readers.
Your transparency is empowering ♥️
There’s about a million quotes in here I want to restack. I love your writing! And your reflections. And the way your mind works. Thank you for so vulnerably sharing your truth and what is most present for you. It’s a gift to us all!